WHO KNEW?

Who knew how strongly I felt about my own pro-life views? Not me. Ever since I read that the Catholic church is relenting on the abortion issue in the health care reform, I have been steaming.

Someone can talk until their blue in the face that the existing Hyde Amendment covers the concerns of pro-life persons, but I won't believe it. Here's why. Just add the little line they want to clarify it unconditionally. The fact that they won't shows that they know there is a loophole.

Admittedly, during my lifetime, I have fallen on both sides of the pro-choice vs. pro-life position on abortion. When you're a teen or a parent of a teen, I think your views on the political side of abortion can be challenged. When a girl is on the cusp of her life and gets pregnant, people just want "it" to go away. She could easily be tempted to want to "erase" her mistake and move on with her life plans. Whether you're in that position or not, you can imagine it among your peers and can imagine the heartbreak of their parents. In that case, it's easy to justify a pro-choice position. I thought to myself, "I would never have an abortion myself, and if I were in the position of being a friend of someone in that position, I would counsel against it, but that efforts to legislate morality were futile b/c people would find a way to do it anyway, but they would be in a more harmful environment." I looked at it like Prohibition and its failure to prevent alcoholism. It just made it an even more hidden and dangerous reality, likely causing more harm that good.

My opinion was half hearted because I felt like I should be pro-life (politically), but for the reasons above I wasn't certain of my position.

As I met people who worked in Christian centered family planning facilities, and heard some of their stories, I came to realize the harm done not only to the baby, but the mom as well, as she deals with her decision to abort her pregnancy. Instead of aborting her pregnancy, she comes to realize that she killed her baby.

This experience was never more potent until I heard a woman on T.V. speak of her experience. She had an abortion, and because of health reasons, it had to be on an ultra sound. She actually looked. It was still early in her pregnancy, but she said that she could see the baby struggle as its life was terminated. She was devastated as she realized what she'd done, and now she is a pro-life advocate. She could see that she killed a baby. She cut a life short.

I came to understand fully that abortion is not like prohibition. It is murder. Still, however, I wasn't willing to place my energies toward a political solution. I'm more likely to want to contribute to pro-life counseling, but I have never been in a pro-life march or something like that.

BUT SEEING THE CATHOLIC CHURCH SET ASIDE THEIR CONVICTIONS ON ABORTION, ELIMINATING THE GUILT OF SO MANY WHO LOOK TO THE PRIESTS FOR THEIR GUIDANCE ON MORALITY, AND THE DECISION'S IMPLICATIONS ON THE HEALTH CARE BILL, I JUST EXPLODED INSIDE.

I realized that while I have had a half hearted opposition to the current state of affairs on the interpretation of a woman's rights, the thought of actually paying for it with the money God has asked me to wisely steward, I just can't handle it.

This is not a Roe vs. Wade disagreement. This is about opening the door to being forced to pay for something you abhor and feel morally opposed to. It's like asking us to use our taxes for porn to be published. I suppose that's a form a free speech and expression, but don't ask me to condone it or pay for it. And, abortion is even worse for those who are strongly convicted that it's not a "choice" but murder.

I pray that God protects our right to steward our money in a way that does not compromise our morality. Jesus says, "Give to Caesar what is Caesar's to give to God what is God's." I will pay my taxes, despite my disagreement with its stewardship...to a point. The life of those babies are God's, not Caesar's.